Futile Horn

07.18.2003 - 1:42 am (in their melifluous rodent tongues)

I bought the new Erin McKeown CD at the Virgin Megastore today. The guy at the counter gave me a filthy look. I am not sure if it was for Erin McKeown or shopping at a Virgin Megastore. Yeah, I know it doesn’t make any sense, but I’m sure the irony would be lost on him.

The Jesus freaks were out in force in Washington Square Park today. They mostly played on garbage cans and did breakdancing, but a few of them were conducting “spiritual surveys” all day. I almost wish they had asked me some questions. I wonder if I could make any of then cry. Not only were they Jesus freaks, but they were sola fide Jesus freaks. I dunno, Lutherans. I hate fucking Lutherans. Protestants in general.

There is a story about an interview with James Joyce where he was asked if he had lost his faith, he replied that was correct. When he asked if that meant he had become a protestant, he said, “I said I lost my faith; I didn’t say I lost my mind.”

I also read that Joyce liked to huff woman’s farts. But you Protestants are still all going to hell.

Anyway, those fucking Jesus freaks ruined a perfectly good afternoon in the park by shouting their ignorant bullshit over a goddamn megaphone. I was considering going over and telling them to can it, when I was sidetracked by a girl from Greenpeace. I am slightly more sympathetic with them. I’m not always certain they all know exactly what they are talking about either, but if they are furious with the president they must be on the right track.

I walked around town for so long all the blood drained and I could barely make a fist.

I bet AMC execs stay up all night long trying to figure out how to insert John Wayne into the Godfather movies.

Whoever put together that Chevy’s tv spot with the “dolla dollabills y’all” in the background should be run up on quality of life chargers.

Uh oh. I think I am seeing mystic squirrels. I better go.

Born to play the funky céilí,
Futile Horn